Disgruntled Hillary Supporter Here

In November, 2008, God willing, I will cast one of the most important votes of my life, for freedom to marry to remain a right of all Californians.

Unfortunately, we're also voting on some other stuff come November, and I don't have nearly the sense of purpose about those that I have about voting against Prop. 8. You see, I am a Disgruntled Hillary Supporter. And I'm giving Barack Obama the doubtful fish-eye, trying to figure out if I'll have endless buyer's regret if I pull the lever on his behalf.

Please understand, this is sort of a big deal. I'm a Democrat, and a daughter and granddaughter of Democrats. At my grandfather's military funeral, my grandmother was annoyed because the young officer who presented her with the folded flag gave it to her on behalf of the President of the United States and a grateful nation. Why, she wanted to know (later), did Mr. Bush have to be invoked? We decided, after some thought, that the president the young man was referring to was actually FDR, under whose command-in-chief my grandpa actually served--or possibly Josiah Bartlet.

I have voted without pain for the guy with the Democratic nomination in each presidential election since I was eighteen. I loved Bill Clinton--I will always love Bill Clinton--but Gore never interested me that much, and I would have taken Edwards over Kerry, although Kerry seemed like a perfectly fine candidate. But I never wasted a moment's thought on the decision. The Democrats pick a guy, and you vote for the guy. End of story. But Barack Obama makes me twitchy and irritable.

Now, I never thought we would get to this point. In fact, I recall, year before last, catching a ride to BART with Mirele the Coworker, and laughing with her over the idea that either a woman (Hillary in particular) OR a black man was going to get the Democratic nod this time around. At the height of the nomination campaign, I recalled that conversation with wonder. How fast times change.

I'm not totally sure why I've taken so completely against Obama. Hillary is part of it, but I'm fairly sure that just about any Democratic governor out there could have kicked her behind in the primary and I would have cussed for a bit and then voted for him/her without pain. I don't think he's secretly a Marxist, or a jihadi, or a cocaine addict, (as a remarkable number of people at LGF do). I think he's inexperienced, full of himself for no apparent reason, and kind of blahhh.

I cannot vote for John McCain. I suppose I WILL vote for Obama, but he annoys me so very much.

Perhaps I need to redefine myself. Instead of being a disgruntled Hillary supporter, I can be a begrudging Obama voter. Or something.

Is anyone else having this problem?